The Short Answer
Three to five minutes. Around 450 to 750 words.
Four is the target. The groom speech has the longest list of obligations and the same amount of room as everyone else, which is the whole difficulty.
The way out is to stop treating the thanks as the speech. They are the entry fee. The speech is what you say to your partner.
The Thanks Problem
A groom speech traditionally thanks both families, the wedding party, the people who travelled, and whoever paid. Done as a list, that is ninety seconds of names and the room disengages before you reach the part that matters.
Compress it. Group the thanks, name only the people whose contribution was genuinely specific, and move on inside forty seconds.
Nobody has ever been moved by being thanked in a sequence. They are moved by being mentioned for a reason.
What Fits in Four Minutes
- Thanks, grouped and brief
- One line to each set of parents that is actually about them
- One story about the two of you, not about your partner in the abstract
- What you are saying yes to, in plain words
- The toast, usually to the bridesmaids or the guests
The fourth is the one to protect. Everything else could be said by someone else at the wedding; that part could not.
Timing
Read it aloud standing up, at 130 to 150 words a minute. Then add a little.
The groom speech is delivered by the person with the busiest day in the room, usually after a drink and a long afternoon. Most people speak faster than they rehearse when nervous and slower when emotional, and this speech often manages both in the same four minutes.
If you are also doing housekeeping or introducing the next speaker, that time is on top. Do not let it eat the part you wrote for your partner.
Frequently Asked Questions
How long should a groom speech be?
Three to five minutes, roughly 450 to 750 words. Four is a good target. Keep the thanks to under a minute so the rest can be about your partner.
How many words is a 5 minute groom speech?
About 650 to 750 words at a natural speaking pace of 130 to 150 words per minute, before you add time for laughter or pauses.
Does the groom speak before or after the best man?
Usually before. The common order is father of the bride, then groom, then best man, though plenty of weddings vary it. Ask whoever is running the room so you know what you are following.
Tell us about the two of you and we will keep the thanks tight and the rest personal.
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