[Groom's name], when I told my friends I was going to give you a speech at our wedding, they said, "Don't roast him too hard." I make no promises.
Let me take you all back to our third date. [Groom's name] took me to a restaurant he described as "casual but classy." It was a Nando's. And you know what? I respected the honesty. He ordered a whole chicken, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "I hope you're not one of those people who just gets a salad." Reader, I was not.
That's the thing about [Groom's name]. He is unapologetically himself. He has strong opinions about sandwich bread, he thinks parallel parking is a competitive sport, and he once spent forty-five minutes explaining the offside rule to my mother, who still does not understand it and never will.
But beneath all the nonsense is the kindest, most dependable person I know. He's the man who quietly fixes things before I even notice they're broken. Who remembers that I hate coriander, that my favourite film is the one I pretend is too embarrassing to admit, and that when I say "I'm fine," I am absolutely not fine.
[Groom's name], you are my favourite person to do nothing with. You're my favourite person to argue with about what to watch on telly. You're my favourite person, full stop.
I can't believe I get to be married to you. Actually, I can, because I'm delightful. But still.
I love you. To my husband, everyone!
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