The Wedding That Took Three Calendars

Good evening, everyone! I'm [Your name], and if you're wondering why I look slightly bewildered to be here, it's because I've had this speech saved in three different versions on my phone for the last two years. Each time the date changed, I tweaked it.

The first version started with a joke about 2020. The second version started with a joke about 2021. By the third, I just wrote "Are we actually doing this?" at the top.

But here we are.

We're actually doing this. And can I just say, [Bride's name] and [Groom's name], your patience has been genuinely heroic. Most couples plan a wedding once.

You planned one three times. You deserve a medal, or at the very least, an extra week of honeymoon.

The thing about waiting, though, is that it proved something we already knew. These two were never in a rush because the wedding was never the point.

The marriage was the point. They've basically been married since the first lockdown anyway, when [Groom's name] discovered that [Bride's name] rearranges the dishwasher after he loads it, and he chose to stay.

So tonight, finally, gloriously, we get to raise a glass to these two incredible people. [Bride's name] and [Groom's name], thank you for waiting for all of us to be here.

It was absolutely, completely, one hundred percent worth the wait. To the couple who refused to give up. Cheers!